I broke Microsoft Word

I am currently writing a science-fiction novel, which has ballooned recently to 250 pages and 70,000 words (two-thirds done!). The other day when I was typing away on it a Microsoft Word error message popped up:

"There are too many spelling or grammatical errors in (document name) to continue displaying them. To check the spelling and grammar of this document, choose Spelling and Grammar from the Tools menu."

What this means is that I won't get anymore red squiggly lines under words unless I break up the novel into smaller documents. There are so many made-up words (alien names, planet names, etc.) that Word has stopped counting them--trust me, I'm not that horrible at spelling and grammar.

I have taken this error message as a compliment, since it shows I've written so much that even my computer can't keep up!

Canadians invade the zoo

A lot of Canadian currency has been showing up at the zoo. Just about every time I open a new roll of change to start the day, I will find at least one Canadian coin in it. Sometimes customers even give them to me, and in the past I've said "I'm sorry, ma'am, this is Canadian." Usually they are good-hearted about it.

I used to filter these coins from my drawer, figuring that the zoo people who count the money wouldn't accept them, but the Queen has been showing up so often that I don't really bother anymore. If Canadian pennies or dimes look like American ones, and no one ever notices the differences when they hand someone change, doesn't that make the coins just as good as American money? Both currencies are currently about equal anyway.

I rarely noticed this in past years. Are the people who roll coins getting lazy, or is more Canadian currency being spent in America?

Sherbert or Sherbet?

A few days ago I brought up the Mackinaw vs. Mackinack question. I reached the conclusion that most customers were really pronouncing the word the correct way and I was the one that was wrong. Congratulations, America.

But when it comes to sherbet all bets are off. Most people who order sherbet-flavored ice cream pronounce it "sherbert," as I did when I was a kid. This mispronunciation knows no age limits; people young or old will order "sherbert." I don't really have any problems with it, as the corruption is so common as to be accepted, but I really want to know where this mangled word came from. Is it because it gives the word a kind of symmetry? Is it because of the name "Herbert?" Did this form become commonplace after the Supreme Court decision Sherbert v. Verner?

(Actually, the Supreme Court case does give me a clue: if Sherbert is a surname, probably German, did the corruption stem from people confusing the flavor with someone they knew with that name?)

Google hasn't turned up a study on this. Maybe this is because this is something you can only track through speech and not the written word because no one ever writes the word as "sherbert." After all, spell check puts that red line through it. But someone must have pinpointed its first appearance in language.

Snowing on the inside

Two weeks ago some ice built up on the freezer door where we keep all the ice cream tubs. As a result, the freezer door could not close properly, and the moisture mixing with the below-freezing temperatures inside caused an unusual weather event: it was snowing inside the freezer.

That's right.

I wish I had some pictures or video to show you. When I opened the freezer door last week (the ice incident did not occur on my watch), you can imagine my shock at seeing a six-inch thick ice chunk on the floor and condensation building up on the top of the freezer. All of the ice cream tubs were covered with a fine white powder.

Hammers and chisels were useless on the ice. Maintenance was eventually able to turn off the freezer to melt the ice, but not after the valiant concessions workers moved out all 15 tubs of ice cream to auxiliary freezers. And once the ice melted, I had to mop up all the water from the freezer and the floor outside...not to mention move every ice cream tub back in the freezer.

The lesson here: winter will find you anywhere in Wisconsin.